I'm not sure if I am quite ready to give up my umbrellas yet. The photos are from last Fall.

Then there are the nets...what?! Yes...I am learning to make nets. I wasn't sure why when the though crossed my mind until I ran across an old journal entry:

Once upon a time
Everything hinged on this emaciated web of lies
Created by assumption, presupposition, and expectation
I left it all behind and that chapter closed
I attempted to sever ties
But memories and emotions remain
I cannot seem to purge them
I hold a bucket of water
Should I leave well enough alone
Or should I destroy the web
And rewrite history?

Web...net...trapped?
What about a net on an umbrella?
Wait...doesn't water hit umbrellas?
Hmmm...
The fabrication of shelter
which is really not shelter at all
but perhaps the idea or illusion of shelter
much like a parasol versus and actual umbrella

"What does it mean to weave?"one may ask
Daily work of the ancients?
Women's work?
A skill of trade?
A kind of craft?
Poetry daft?
Calculate, think, scribble, count, tie
Up, down, and back around
Count, tie
Repeat
Undo neatly
Tie more, loop more
Crank, wind, and comb
Tight, striaght, and evenly spaced
Thread those heddles
Tie the treadle
Sley the reed
Excuse me?
Fabrication is not a simple task
"What does it mean to weave?," one asks

Sometimes you have to revisit the beginning
The answer is often in a previous piece of work

There are sixty ideas
Sweet and liquid
Swimming in a warming pot
But they must be condensed
Into a small handful
Of solid pieces of hard candy
Such is the beginning of a new semester

Thoughts on "In Search of Catharsis"

Wanderings:

DON'T!
Quit all that assuming!
Is this rice because the bag says it is?
Oh, where did she go?

I forget the meaning of drawing…lines in space? Marks?

Empty and full
There and not there
This is a struggle between structure and this kind of freedom
The jacket is the structure
The fabric wants out
But do you need both?
I guess to an extent you need both
The jacket is a jacket and no more without the fabric
And the fabric is just fabric without the jacket
The whole piece exists on the tension of these two elements
Tension exists in between in the interstice
I’m me v.s. How you are when you don’t feel like you
A knot? The segment in the jacket…
The part stuck in the jacket longing to puddle on the floor maybe

It’s not permanent yet
It needs a different hanger
But nevertheless, it’s right here
That’s where I want it.

Knot or curtain…knot or curtain…curtain I decided
Looking into that window
Everyone at one time only saw autumns gold
But that’s not really the whole story now, is it?
Things, tags, and labels tacked on over what I muttered
But inside runs a different tale
All I wanted was to vanish
To escape as chiffon and pour onto the floor
But look closer
I didn’t leave unscathed
Love will help us over come
Somehow, that’s what came of this
Deny the form…
I didn’t want anyone or any “body” there
Another body in the crowd
They tagged and labeled her this, that, and the other
So she had to find a way out

Final Thoughts:

DON’t- quit all that assuming!
Is this rice because the bag says it is?
Oh, where did she go?

I forget the meaning of drawing…lines in space? Marks?

Empty and full
There and not there
This is a struggle between structure and this kind of freedom
The jacket is the structure
The fabric wants out
But do you need both?
I guess to an extent you need both
The jacket is a jacket and no more without the fabric
And the fabric is just fabric without the jacket
The whole piece exists on the tension of these two elements
Tension exists in between in the interstice
I’m me vs. How you are when you don’t feel like you
A knot? The segment in the jacket…
The part stuck in the jacket longing to puddle on the floor maybe

It’s not permanent yet
It needs a different hanger
But nevertheless, it’s right here
That’s where I want it.

Knot or curtain…knot or curtain…curtain I decided
Looking into that window
Everyone at one time only saw autumns gold
But that’s not really the whole story now, is it?
Things, tags, and labels tacked on over what I muttered
But inside runs a different tale
All I wanted was to vanish
To escape as chiffon and pour onto the floor
But look closer
I didn’t leave unscathed
Love will help us over come
Somehow, that’s what came of this
Deny the form…
I didn’t want anyone or any “body” there
Another body in the crowd
They tagged and labeled her this, that, and the other
So she had to find a way out

Final Thoughts
At last…
It whispered to me that morning,
“I am complete.”
Early morning and sounds of footsteps echo overhead
The only class in the building
Alone otherwise in this hall
I sat in a chair
Across from a jacket now suspended in space
Contemplating what had just happened
I tried so hard to label
The inside of that jacket
The very thing I sought to escape
Still found me in the end
My search for catharsis
And even in this piece
There has been no release in its entirety
I was reminded,
“Nothing. It needs nothing. Let it be blank.”
There was a force a work
This urge to label
Even now, it is so difficult to escape
Silence still-
Save for the dance class
Light pouring through the old building
Isighed…too much in my head
I was missing things again…
Nevertheless is has been finished
And now the rest of the world
Can make what they want of it
I have had my say